The outcome was that I have two brain tumors, one 4.5 cm in the front and the second 3cm in the 4 chamber in the place where all neurons are connected.
Suddenly in that moment I was totally depressed and hopeless, but after a few days in hospital I started to change my thinking and decided to not give up, because my wife and daughter have nobody except me, and I still have to take care of them.
In January 2018 I had my first of three surgeries, after being in hospital for three weeks and it was a very difficult and lonely time. ( even support of wife and daughter in this kind situations is challenging because I have to hide my emotions in front of them)
The second and more dangerous brain surgery back in June 2019, again leaving my family for a few weeks in hospital meant I was alone ( alone with thoughts that I did not want to show to my family ) again and with feelings of fear, stress and not-knowing what would happen meant I was so scared for my life and what my family would go through.
The third surgery in January 2020 which then after battling a strong infection in the part of the skull and AGAIN weeks’ in hospital I kept getting knocked back down and feeling like my life was over and what else could possibly be next!
Living with depression, and even when I knew that I still have my wife and daughter by my side who without them I wouldn’t have made it through.
All the countless weeks in hospitals show me just how important is to be able to talk to someone, not only the people I know, but with anyone, meeting people on the ward, and expressing things that sometimes even the family may not have time to talk or would not understand would give me the release or a thought process I needed to go on and keep battling on for them.
Of course I had my phone, but social media is not really the place where we can start conversations with strangers (who often judge on the basis of photos, videos) who use social media to share how glamorous our life is at a moment or a photo of a beautiful holiday in the sun.
I wasn’t going to share or talk to someone about what I was going through as honestly nobody on those platforms cared and it wasn’t private enough as I didn’t want it shared around the world,
I wasn’t looking for attention or likes… I just wanted to talk.
So that is why the world needs emood. simply just to talk, no judgement or people sharing for likes or getting attention. It’s about connecting people so they are never alone if they have a phone, or not able to share what they feel with loved ones or friends as we don’t sometimes need their judgement.
This is how the idea for emood was born;
2020 January – Beaumont hospital (emergency surgery – very bad infection) After the evening meal, Nurse ( I do not even remember her name ) came to me ( she usually works in different ward but that day she was at St. Mary’s ward – night shift) we talked for a while ( she was doing exams and bloods in the meantime)and she asked me “do you have netflix? – watch secrets. At the end she said goodnight and I have never seen her again.
I watch “Secret” then research YouTube all night , I realize that lot of people live with this motto, and I knew that everything was going to be alright.
I didn’t have easy life but I always was want to do something good ( be remembered as someone how give a smile more than sadness, to help people around me, create opportunities for them and be happy with their success, smile and happiness.) But living on weekly basis with such a small chance to ( create something that can make dose dreams to come true)
Secret “law of attraction” – I knew it all my life. But I really started to ( believe ) that day in the hospital.
Believe mean – start to risk and take chances, not every time you will win but have to still believe and constantly think about life success for you, your family, friends and community. You will achieve what you want.
This is how I understood the secret.
I start to think positively and really believe and visually that I still have an opportunity to make it happen. I knew that opportunity would come, I just needed to (catch) in the right time and take a chance. At this point I didn’t even know what this could be.
One day at my regular daily walk ( rehabilitation) I start to feel very lonely and want to talk with someone who not know me, not judging me, ” just don’t give a f..k ” and just talk, like in hospital where everyone is after a serious illness ( cancer, amputation) but when I was with these people we were not judged, not looking by our illness, nationality, gender, we just talked about different things and we were happy.
I started to miss the hospital and this careless talk. because at home we haven’t had a great situation since 2017 when I had my first epilepsy attack and in hospital I found that I have quite big 2 brain tumors. I couldn’t give up because I am responsible for my wife and daughter. But those 4 years were very hard. Even after those weeks in hospitals and 3 brain surgerys, and all other things happened through all this years, I am always trying to find good things in these moments and situations. Learn from those experiences and I know that all those things bring to this point.
I am grateful for every good and hard moments in my life and especially the last 21y with my wife and daughter.
That day February 2021, I started to think about mobile application where I can chat with people being absolutely anonymous, where I can just chat, not showing pictures what I eat or what I have – for all those things are different platforms.
If I show my picture at present ( after surgery) I will be automatically treated more gently or arouse regret or at least I will think that way.
So I wanted the place where I will only be held accountable for what I say from what I said.
Where I can ask for objective feedback, where I can communicate in my native language, because not everyone speaks English.
Where I can practice my language skills by talking with real people.
Where I can meet people with the same interests and discuss ideas, change opinions.
Where I can ask for help or help someone who is in difficult situation and not be afraid of own opinion as we all are the same and equal but everyone has own individual character ( personality ) and That’s making us so special.
So We invent emood application and create emood project, it’s not only mobile application (communication tool) but also concept of emood nation where people can share their real emotions, worries, happiness, sadness. Because we all have a need to be connecting each other.
Especially now when the situation around the world is like this with lockdowns and restrictions. More and more people are spending time on the Internet, but not everyone is ( brave enough to show himself in social media) – – or be afraid to be ( judging, hate).
Even famous people sometime would like to hear real opinion about their new movie, song ,new restaurant, sport success or falling.
I want to create community and brand which going to be ( synonymous to – careless and unafraid place to talk )
Where you are not alone ever again.
I decided to act, for a month I was doing market research, designing applications and functions that I would like to be available to everyone.
Having no financial resources to implement my project, I started looking for people with whom I could create emood.
Now we are a team ( more like family who take care for project as parent care about a baby) of 3 people with passion to do something good and positive,who spent 9 months making the emood app.
We believe the world needs emood. simply just to talk, no judgement or people sharing for likes or getting attention. It’s about connecting people so they are never alone if they have a phone, or not able to share what they feel with loved ones or friends as we don’t sometimes need their judgement.